Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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