Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
