It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
