official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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