If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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