She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
So squirting runs in the family.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
