and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
