I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
me + whiskey = a bad person
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I came so hard my ears popped.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
