So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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