And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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