Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
