Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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