i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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