I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
