Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
