We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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