I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
she looked like the before picture.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Randomize
