Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
