I will die if light touches me.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
