Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
