just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
