u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
