if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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