No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
