dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
