32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
