Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
