i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
