just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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