their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
