he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
