So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Randomize
