Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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