Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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