its not stalking. its research.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
