a queef is a wish your heart makes.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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