woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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