So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
