real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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