Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize