I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
