How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize