i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
ugly people sure do ruin things
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
She bit a glass in half.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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