From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
operation harelip BJ is a go
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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