S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
