I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
