I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
