Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
