Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
