JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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